Post updated March 16, 2023
By: Brian C Jenkins

Wouldn’t it be nice to have a greater understanding of what our feelings look like? We live life so fast that it gets difficult to see the warning signs that anger may produce. A great way to learn to control our anger is to know and define what it looks like to include why. Today we will cover the Five Stages of Anger. The goal is to see how the Bible defines anger and also see what a few famous people have also said and expressed regarding this topic.

Stage 1

Annoyance
To be irritated or distracted from your normal state of being.

Proverbs 12:16 English Standard Version (ESV)

The vexation of a fool is known at once,
but the prudent ignores an insult.

Easiest to dissolve.
Example: While driving, I feel annoyed by the heavy traffic.
Example: I feel annoyed when things don’t go the way I thought.

Little to think about.
Example: You begin coaching yourself, it’s not worth it.
Example: I don’t have time for this.
Disappointment may or may not set in.
Disappointment: the feeling of sadness or displeasure by the nonfulfillment of our hopes or expectations.

Proverbs 29:11 English Standard Version (ESV)

A fool gives full vent to his spirit, but a wise man quietly holds it back.

Easiest to forgive.
*Forgiveness is the practice of letting go; to stop feelings of anger.
*True Forgiveness means…
**Never bring the offense up again as a weapon.
***Holding the past over someone’s head is a potential weapon
Example: How can you tell me I can’t cuss when you used
to cuss at me all the time?
***Using the past against someone.
Example: Ever since you told me you were thinking about leaving, I
just don’t care what I do because you’re going to leave anyway.
***Easy to pray and give to God.

Mark 11:25 English Standard Version (ESV)

25 And whenever you stand praying, forgive, if you have anything against anyone, so that your
Father also who is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses.”[a]
Footnotes: Mark 11:25 Some manuscripts add verse 26: But if you do not forgive, neither will
your Father who is in heaven forgives your trespasses.

***Freedom from;
****Bitterness: anger and disappointment at being treated unfairly
****Resentment: bitter indignation at having been treated unfairly
****Anxiety: worry, nervousness, or unease, typically about an imminent event or something with an uncertain outcome.
****Depression: feelings of severe despondency (loss of hope, confidence, or courage) and dejection (low spirits or poor in spirit).
****Frustrated Stress
****Easily elevation through the anger stages.

Proverbs 27:3 English Standard Version (ESV)

A stone is heavy, and sand is weighty, but a fool’s provocation is heavier than both.

God always gives His best to those who leave the choice with him.
Jim Elliot

Stage 2

Offended
Showing displeasure in being annoyed.

Proverbs 17:22 English Standard Version (ESV)

A joyful heart is good medicine but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.

When people do not respect us we are sharply offended; yet in his private heart no man much respects himself.
Mark Twain

Early signs of frustration.
*Frustration is the perceived resilience to the fulfillment of individual will.
*The greater the resistance, the easier and faster a person will elevate through the stages. The offended begins to look for a resolution from the offender.

To be offended is a choice we make; it is not a condition inflicted or imposed upon us by someone or something else.
David A. Bednar

Forgiveness is still an option.
*Usually the stage where it is still fairly easy to remember to forgive if the frustration levels are low. The higher the frustration, the harder it is to forgive. Slight difficulty in thought process.
*The earliest sign of tunnel vision. Emotional bruising may begin.
*Earliest stages tend to warrant looking for understanding.
*Later stages start to turn into wanting others to feel what the offended feels. Past may be used as a learning tool.
*The offended may begin looking towards the past to understand the present.

Stage 3

Upset
To be disturbed or very unhappy.

I’m sensitive and get easily upset and insulted.
Sia Furler

Elevated levels of frustration.
A demand for resolution from the offender
Conditional Forgiveness
A more narrow thought process shapes a kind of tunnel vision.
The past may be brought up more frequently as either a learning tool or a weapon.
Emotional wounds may appear to open up.

It’s so important to realize that every time you get upset, it drains your emotional energy. Losing your cool makes you tired. Getting angry a lot messes with your health.
Joyce Meyers

The physical division may be imminent.
*If activated as a tactic, would be used either as a preventative measure in hopes to decrease stages or to enact a wicked scheme.
Character, morals, & virtues will now be in question.
*Internally, the offended may begin looking towards the past to understand the present.

It sounds funny, but my biggest fear is that I’m not perfect. I’m a perfectionist, and I get upset when things go wrong or when I don’t do well.
Nick Jonas

Outside influences may also become a factor.

Never make a decision when you are upset, sad, jealous or in love.
Mario Teguh

Stage 4

Full Blown Anger
A non-cooperative response to a perceived, hurt, or threat.

I don’t usually lose my temper, but if I get angry, it’s true – I’m scary.
Eva Mendes

Very hard to dissolve
The anger can potentially turn into a rage!
*Rage (often called fury or frenzy) is a feeling of intense, violent, or growing anger
The hardest to forgive.
The making of emotional fallout.
Sound reasoning has all but disappeared.
The highest form of insult & embarrassment.
Division can quickly and easily turn into anxiety & depression.
Non-Division could turn to violence & malice.
If the past was brought up, it is now used as a weapon.
Good character, morals, and virtues disappear like vapors.

For every minute you remain angry, you give up sixty seconds of peace of mind.
Ralph Waldo Emerson

Offensive and Defensive tactics to undermine any hopes of peaceful progress are in play.
Example: Mocking, jeering, & instigation techniques are used to force all parties involved to elevate.
Some type of abuse is inevitable to any and all parties involved.

Anger is a killing thing: it kills the man who angers, for each rage leaves him less than he had been before – it takes something from him.
Louis L’Amour

Stage 5

Wrath
Strong, vengeful, anger or indignation or retributory punishment
for an offense or a crime.

_{The unthinkable becomes thinkable
A form of Justice must occur
*Revenge
*Purification (To create order)}

The independent girl is a person before whose wrath only the most rash dare stand, and, they, it must be confessed, with much fear and trembling.
Lou Henry Hoover

“Fairest and dearest, your wrath and anger are more heavy than I can bear; but learn that I cannot tell what you wish me to say without sinning against my honour too grievously.”
Marie de France

Proverbs 27:3 English Standard Version (ESV)

Refrain from anger, and forsake wrath! Fret not yourself; it tends only to evil.

Romans 12:19 (ESV)

Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave it to the wrath of God, for it is written, “Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord.”

James 1:20 (ESV)

For the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God.

Proverbs 15:1 (ESV)

A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.

Ephesians 4:26-27 (ESV)

Be angry and do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, and give no opportunity to the devil.

Thank you for reading my Blog. Please leave a comment and let me know how God has been blessing your Life.

God bless you and yours. Stay Salty!

Amen